i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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