i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I would fuck him just for his dog
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
