Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Randomize
