Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
