Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
