Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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