I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
