Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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