butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
