Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
