May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
