my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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