hotel room ftw
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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