He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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