its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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