Are we in a gay sports bar?
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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