So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
