You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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