I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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