i think my mom watched the whole time
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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