This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
