Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Four minutes until I can fart!
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
He? As in you personified your dick?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
