You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
its not stalking. its research.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize