I wannas sexs uuuuu
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize
