I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
