I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
