at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
