if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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