I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
