"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
