i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I can't put those talents on a resume
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
