he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I got inside last night via doggy door
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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