Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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