i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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