There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize