So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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