I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
