We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I didn't notice because vodka
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Randomize
