I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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