Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize