I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
