i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize