You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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