the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
