were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
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