I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize