I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
