She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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