break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I need water and some morals
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
