i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
