She's JV to your varsity
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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